My definition of “Friend”

July 23, 2008 at 9:06 pm 2 comments

I was reading a blog earlier, and it got me to thinking….thinking about friends. This blogger was deep in thought, trying to figure out…(and he couldn’t) why his friends like him. I admire this young man, and felt bad for him while reading his words. He just celebrated his one year anniversary of sobriety, and is still working through some of his demons. I have no doubt that he will prevail, and eventually figure out why his friends like him. Anyway, I got to thinking about my friends,,,and why they like me. Without coming out and asking…I think the answers would be all the good things I think about myself…I’m real…I love to laugh…I have a sense of humor…sometimes it’s a little warped..I’ll admit that…hehe. I’m generous…I’m compassionate….I’m a good listener…the list goes on and on…lol.

A few years ago, I wrote the following words when I was having some doubts of my own:


The word friend has different meanings for different people. It’s a word many use to describe an acquaintance, a co-worker, even a regular that they see at the local pub. It is a word often used loosely.

Tighten it up, and you have what many may call a true or close friend. A close friend is someone you can count on, a person who is considerate of your feelings, is genuine, sincere and accepts you for who you are. A true friend does not necessarily last a lifetime, but may come and go. And although your friendship may only be temporary, you know that it is true. On the other hand, you may think a person is a close friend, only to be disappointed in the realization that they aren’t at all what you thought they were. They have another agenda. So be it. I myself am grateful for all the close friendships I have had. Even those that have come and gone. They have all enriched my life in one way or another. I try to find at least one positive thing to take from a friendship that no longer shines. Perhaps exposure to a certain genre of music, or maybe the desire to expand your horizons by taking an interest in something you would have not otherwise had a desire to.

Best friend is also a term that has different meanings to different people. I have had a few best friends in my life. They were not acquired overnight. It took time for the trust and mutual respect to take hold. There is no doubt that the bond is steadfast and true. A best friend always has your back, unconditionally and without hesitation. A best friend will listen to all you have to say, and will not pass judgment. I never have to second-guess my best friends’ intentions. They will do anything for you, sometimes without you even having to ask. A best friend will answer honestly when asked a difficult question, and even though their response may not be what you want to hear, you know it is answered without malice.

In my book, best friends last forever.

Friendship is based on mutual respect, honesty and trust. If you are willing to be the real you, honest and open, then I promise you will have a steadfast and true lifetime friend in me.

Until next time…Peace


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2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Zoe Kessler  |  September 2, 2008 at 8:39 am

    Foxy, I have to say your thoughts about definition of a friend and a best friend were right on the money. Last year I lost my one true (or so I thought) best friend after a terrible fight. She accused me of being a drug adict because I have had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalia for 21 yrs. and I take several medicines. She didn’t bother to research the meds I take to see if they were addictive. She just decided that she knew more about me than me or my doctor. Being chronically ill leaves you with few friends and alot of time to think. That is why I am a crafter. The crafts I make don’t judge me or talk back to me. Maybe when I learn how to blog I will meet people to write to that have the same interest that I do. By the way, your crafts are beautiful and your thoughts and words ring clear and true. Have a great day. God bless you today and everyday.
    Zoe’ (miss priss)

  • 2. retta519  |  September 2, 2008 at 3:35 pm

    Hiya Zoe aka Miss Priss…so sorry you lost your friend. I know a girl who has Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia…and I know it’s no walk in the park. What I don’t understand is, if you’re taking a medication for the treatment of this debilitating disease, you’d think she’d be happy for you, and not call you a druggy! Geesh. Maybe someday she’ll understand. Until then…carry on! There are lots of nice gals over on the ACMoore forum/messageboards…come on over!

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